kindness

A Gift-Giving Season, All the Year Round
photo shows a pink package with a pink bow on a pink table covered in rainbow confetti in front of a sky blue wall

Going through the winter holidays, all across the globe, many people enjoy the giving and receiving of gifts. One of the recurring features of life—in almost any culture—is a season of gift-giving.

Yet giving seems to figure prominently in the daily lives of people we know, all the year round.

And it takes many forms.

Think of those people in our lives who can do the things we need done, but cannot do ourselves. They understand their personal strengths, develop them into a capacity to help others, and spend time each day improving life for those around them.

And there are those who brighten our day with a smile or a kind word. Their positive perspectives can be contagious.

And (perhaps now more than ever) there are those crucial people in our lives who give us their time—time to connect with us and seek to understand us. When we need some perspective from another, someone who will listen, help us take stock and reflect, those moments can be a tremendous gift.

They say it is better to give than receive. Perhaps giving transforms us in powerful ways, gaining us closer connections with the people in our lives, no matter how intimate or fleeting our association may be.

Gifts born of our talents or perspective or time do not have bows on them, but they may be the most consequential to others.

Clients, in this chapter of life I have more time: if you could use some of it, I would give it to you gladly, unconditionally. Email me or call.

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Play the audio version of this post below:

A Gift-Giving Season, All the Year Round – 228Main.com Presents: The Best of Leibman Financial Services

This text is available at https://www.228Main.com/.

Don’t Talk About My Friend That Way!

People do love dramas and reality shows, but in real life, it’s not always the jealous neighbor or the loud socialite who spews the worst judgments about us. 

We’re pretty good at doing that to ourselves. 

In our financial lives, it’s easy to slip into judgment. We berate our past selves for not getting organized sooner. We doubt whether our current plan is on track or whether we will be able to handle whatever arrives tomorrow. 

There’s a trick for that. It’s free, it’s simple, and most of us have been practicing it all our lives. 

Be a better friend—to yourself.  

Kristin Neff studies the psychology of self-compassion and puts it this way: “It’s natural for us to try to be kind to the people we care about in our lives. … We comfort them when they’re going through hard times. In other words, most of us are very good at being understanding, kind and compassionate toward others. But how many of us are good at being compassionate to ourselves?” 

Financial freedom isn’t totally about what’s in your pocket. We believe that you can be a good friend to yourself—and you’ll become a better steward of your resources in the process. 

Kindness, common humanity, and mindfulness are the key ingredients in compassionate responses according to Neff. When we give ourselves time to pause and reflect, we can have more reassuring conversations with ourselves—ones that don’t end in self-sabotage or ongoing anxiety. When was the last time your inner voice was compassionate? 

  • “You know, lots of people make mistakes along the way: where can you grow from your past?” 
  • “Of course you get worried sometimes: you care deeply about your family, your legacy, your work…” 
  • “Notice how you’re jumping ahead? Maybe make a note, but then let yourself come back to what you can do right now.” 

Sure: this kind of self-talk isn’t for everyone. If that’s true for you, then try substituting my voice in your head: “Hey! Don’t you treat my friend like that!” And then let yourself off the hook. 

Friends, when you’d like to talk more, drop us a line. 

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